I haven't blogged in a while. At least not about anything productive and spiritual. It seems like lately I've lost focus. I'm struggling with finding my place in God's family.
Lately I haven't had a job. Jonathan is not here. I feel like I've been wasting my days. Sure I've kept busy with church stuff and friends. But I haven't really accomplished anything.
I feel like I'm just sitting by waiting for God to do something. Even though I know that He's done enough and it's me who needs to get up and run with it. I just don't know what to do. I need to do SOMETHING, I just don't know what.
Which leads me again to not knowing what I need to accomplish. I mean, I need a job. Duh. I'm tired of looking for that though. It's just a job. It just provides earthly things for me. I don't think a job brings me an spiritual worth.
I need to accomplish a closer relationship with Jonathan. We need to keep growing and learning. A stagnant relationship is a dying one. It's difficult to grow together when we're 3 states apart. Ultimately I feel like this is going to benefit us, and now it's the best option, but we've got to work harder at it.
I've been itching to go on a mission trip lately. Just to get away. Unfortunately, that requires money...of which I do not have. I think that would revamp my spiritual life. I thought about trying to do China Now. (Which involves living in China for a year doing mission work and teaching English.) Jonathan and I talked about it, and the ever-sweet man that he is told me to go for it. Ultimately, I did not. For him, mostly. I don't want to leave him for a year.
Lately, I find myself becoming more irritable and frustrated at senseless things. Like a broken toilet. Or dirty dishes. It's because I've lost my focus. What am I here for? What's my job?
Today needs to be the day I renew my devotion. I don't know what God's doing with me, but I need to look harder. I should never just stop.
I'm open to ideas as well. What do you think I should be doing? Where should I go?
Struggling
I haven't blogged in a while. At least not about anything productive and spiritual. It seems like lately I've lost focus. I'm struggling with finding my place in God's family.
Lately I haven't had a job. Jonathan is not here. I feel like I've been wasting my days. Sure I've kept busy with church stuff and friends. But I haven't really accomplished anything.
I feel like I'm just sitting by waiting for God to do something. Even though I know that He's done enough and it's me who needs to get up and run with it. I just don't know what to do. I need to do SOMETHING, I just don't know what.
Which leads me again to not knowing what I need to accomplish. I mean, I need a job. Duh. I'm tired of looking for that though. It's just a job. It just provides earthly things for me. I don't think a job brings me an spiritual worth.
I need to accomplish a closer relationship with Jonathan. We need to keep growing and learning. A stagnant relationship is a dying one. It's difficult to grow together when we're 3 states apart. Ultimately I feel like this is going to benefit us, and now it's the best option, but we've got to work harder at it.
I've been itching to go on a mission trip lately. Just to get away. Unfortunately, that requires money...of which I do not have. I think that would revamp my spiritual life. I thought about trying to do China Now. (Which involves living in China for a year doing mission work and teaching English.) Jonathan and I talked about it, and the ever-sweet man that he is told me to go for it. Ultimately, I did not. For him, mostly. I don't want to leave him for a year.
Lately, I find myself becoming more irritable and frustrated at senseless things. Like a broken toilet. Or dirty dishes. It's because I've lost my focus. What am I here for? What's my job?
Today needs to be the day I renew my devotion. I don't know what God's doing with me, but I need to look harder. I should never just stop.
I'm open to ideas as well. What do you think I should be doing? Where should I go?
Lately I haven't had a job. Jonathan is not here. I feel like I've been wasting my days. Sure I've kept busy with church stuff and friends. But I haven't really accomplished anything.
I feel like I'm just sitting by waiting for God to do something. Even though I know that He's done enough and it's me who needs to get up and run with it. I just don't know what to do. I need to do SOMETHING, I just don't know what.
Which leads me again to not knowing what I need to accomplish. I mean, I need a job. Duh. I'm tired of looking for that though. It's just a job. It just provides earthly things for me. I don't think a job brings me an spiritual worth.
I need to accomplish a closer relationship with Jonathan. We need to keep growing and learning. A stagnant relationship is a dying one. It's difficult to grow together when we're 3 states apart. Ultimately I feel like this is going to benefit us, and now it's the best option, but we've got to work harder at it.
I've been itching to go on a mission trip lately. Just to get away. Unfortunately, that requires money...of which I do not have. I think that would revamp my spiritual life. I thought about trying to do China Now. (Which involves living in China for a year doing mission work and teaching English.) Jonathan and I talked about it, and the ever-sweet man that he is told me to go for it. Ultimately, I did not. For him, mostly. I don't want to leave him for a year.
Lately, I find myself becoming more irritable and frustrated at senseless things. Like a broken toilet. Or dirty dishes. It's because I've lost my focus. What am I here for? What's my job?
Today needs to be the day I renew my devotion. I don't know what God's doing with me, but I need to look harder. I should never just stop.
I'm open to ideas as well. What do you think I should be doing? Where should I go?
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