Four-and-a-half months into this relationship and it feels.....different.
Typically in relationships, things start off in high gear. You know, the "honeymoon" phase. And after a while things start to fade. You learn the other's faults and bad habits and shortcomings. And things just aren't as bright as they once were.
By now, as in most relationships, we've gotten into a good routine. We've learned each others likes and dislikes. We know each others schedule. This can also mean that the newness has worn off. It's just normal. It's not exciting anymore.
But there are some very distinct differences in this one.
1. He still adores me. It's like it hasn't worn down. Maybe it's even gotten stronger. He wrote me a poem last night. He tells me even more than before how much he thinks of me and loves me.
2. I still adore him. I feel like I love him more everyday. I didn't even think it was possible. 4.5 months in and I love him more than I've ever loved anyone. (I realize I'm being "mushy" which is entirely against my nature, but this is a big deal.)
3. We're still putting God first. You know how after a while, things start to be put on the back burner. Unfortunately in my past relationships, one of the first things to go was God. In this one, we're still getting stronger in Him. Sure, sometimes it's difficult to find time to pray in the morning or at night because of our schedules, but we stay up later or wake up earlier to make it happen. It's hard to stay on the straight and narrow, even with a Christian mate, but it's a lot easier when you have someone pulling you in the right direction. It's easier when you have someone to confide your temptations in. It's better when someone is there to help you and protect you from the world.
Almost 5 months ago, I went out with Jonathan but didn't expect it to work. I was broken. I was set on being single and I did not need another man in my life. But he was sweet, and cute, and deserved a chance. He was smart and funny and kind, but I figured after a while it would wear off and he would become like every other man that has been in my life.
I was cold at times. Unloving. Unlovable. I didn't have any hope. My heart was shut off and though he was a great guy, I wasn't going to fall for him.
For some reason, he stayed around. He thought I was worth something. He was patient and careful. He didn't push me to love him or rush me into feeling things that I never wanted to feel again. He helped me put my life back into place. And after a while I found myself really loving him. Not just because he was my boyfriend, but because he brought light back into my life.
For those of you who don't know, the first 4 months of 2011 are just a picture of darkness for me. The life that I led was bleak and hopeless. I was a mess. A complete and total broken mess.
And at my worst, Jonathan saw something that he liked about me. (I still don't know what that is, but bless him for finding something.) And if you know Jonathan, you know he's stubborn and determined enough to not give up on me. He knew I was worth it. He gave me hope and love when I couldn't bear to love back. He found me at my worst and stuck by me until I was better.
This one is different. This man is different from all the others.
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
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The Difference
Four-and-a-half months into this relationship and it feels.....different.
Typically in relationships, things start off in high gear. You know, the "honeymoon" phase. And after a while things start to fade. You learn the other's faults and bad habits and shortcomings. And things just aren't as bright as they once were.
By now, as in most relationships, we've gotten into a good routine. We've learned each others likes and dislikes. We know each others schedule. This can also mean that the newness has worn off. It's just normal. It's not exciting anymore.
But there are some very distinct differences in this one.
1. He still adores me. It's like it hasn't worn down. Maybe it's even gotten stronger. He wrote me a poem last night. He tells me even more than before how much he thinks of me and loves me.
2. I still adore him. I feel like I love him more everyday. I didn't even think it was possible. 4.5 months in and I love him more than I've ever loved anyone. (I realize I'm being "mushy" which is entirely against my nature, but this is a big deal.)
3. We're still putting God first. You know how after a while, things start to be put on the back burner. Unfortunately in my past relationships, one of the first things to go was God. In this one, we're still getting stronger in Him. Sure, sometimes it's difficult to find time to pray in the morning or at night because of our schedules, but we stay up later or wake up earlier to make it happen. It's hard to stay on the straight and narrow, even with a Christian mate, but it's a lot easier when you have someone pulling you in the right direction. It's easier when you have someone to confide your temptations in. It's better when someone is there to help you and protect you from the world.
Almost 5 months ago, I went out with Jonathan but didn't expect it to work. I was broken. I was set on being single and I did not need another man in my life. But he was sweet, and cute, and deserved a chance. He was smart and funny and kind, but I figured after a while it would wear off and he would become like every other man that has been in my life.
I was cold at times. Unloving. Unlovable. I didn't have any hope. My heart was shut off and though he was a great guy, I wasn't going to fall for him.
For some reason, he stayed around. He thought I was worth something. He was patient and careful. He didn't push me to love him or rush me into feeling things that I never wanted to feel again. He helped me put my life back into place. And after a while I found myself really loving him. Not just because he was my boyfriend, but because he brought light back into my life.
For those of you who don't know, the first 4 months of 2011 are just a picture of darkness for me. The life that I led was bleak and hopeless. I was a mess. A complete and total broken mess.
And at my worst, Jonathan saw something that he liked about me. (I still don't know what that is, but bless him for finding something.) And if you know Jonathan, you know he's stubborn and determined enough to not give up on me. He knew I was worth it. He gave me hope and love when I couldn't bear to love back. He found me at my worst and stuck by me until I was better.
This one is different. This man is different from all the others.
Typically in relationships, things start off in high gear. You know, the "honeymoon" phase. And after a while things start to fade. You learn the other's faults and bad habits and shortcomings. And things just aren't as bright as they once were.
By now, as in most relationships, we've gotten into a good routine. We've learned each others likes and dislikes. We know each others schedule. This can also mean that the newness has worn off. It's just normal. It's not exciting anymore.
But there are some very distinct differences in this one.
1. He still adores me. It's like it hasn't worn down. Maybe it's even gotten stronger. He wrote me a poem last night. He tells me even more than before how much he thinks of me and loves me.
2. I still adore him. I feel like I love him more everyday. I didn't even think it was possible. 4.5 months in and I love him more than I've ever loved anyone. (I realize I'm being "mushy" which is entirely against my nature, but this is a big deal.)
3. We're still putting God first. You know how after a while, things start to be put on the back burner. Unfortunately in my past relationships, one of the first things to go was God. In this one, we're still getting stronger in Him. Sure, sometimes it's difficult to find time to pray in the morning or at night because of our schedules, but we stay up later or wake up earlier to make it happen. It's hard to stay on the straight and narrow, even with a Christian mate, but it's a lot easier when you have someone pulling you in the right direction. It's easier when you have someone to confide your temptations in. It's better when someone is there to help you and protect you from the world.
Almost 5 months ago, I went out with Jonathan but didn't expect it to work. I was broken. I was set on being single and I did not need another man in my life. But he was sweet, and cute, and deserved a chance. He was smart and funny and kind, but I figured after a while it would wear off and he would become like every other man that has been in my life.
I was cold at times. Unloving. Unlovable. I didn't have any hope. My heart was shut off and though he was a great guy, I wasn't going to fall for him.
For some reason, he stayed around. He thought I was worth something. He was patient and careful. He didn't push me to love him or rush me into feeling things that I never wanted to feel again. He helped me put my life back into place. And after a while I found myself really loving him. Not just because he was my boyfriend, but because he brought light back into my life.
For those of you who don't know, the first 4 months of 2011 are just a picture of darkness for me. The life that I led was bleak and hopeless. I was a mess. A complete and total broken mess.
And at my worst, Jonathan saw something that he liked about me. (I still don't know what that is, but bless him for finding something.) And if you know Jonathan, you know he's stubborn and determined enough to not give up on me. He knew I was worth it. He gave me hope and love when I couldn't bear to love back. He found me at my worst and stuck by me until I was better.
This one is different. This man is different from all the others.
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